No one usually thinks of me as a rule breaker. I was the kid in first grade who woke up out of a dead sleep and began crying because I realized my library book was a day overdue. That’s how much of a rule-abiding citizen I am. But what’s wrong with that? Rules are made for a reason. They are meant to keep the fabric of society from unraveling completely. Needless to say, when I do break the rules, I break them in the least intense manner possible.
Here are a list of some of my offenses against society:
– I don’t pull and peel “pull and peel Twizzlers.”
– When I was in high school, my idea of ditching was calling my mom and having her excuse me so I could go to Starbucks.
– Sometimes I don’t use caution on wet floors that have the little caution cone up.
– I pull out my cellphone in dark movie theaters, even when they tell me not to.
– I swim less than 30 minutes after I eat.
– I drove home after curfew once… on my way home from a debate meet #cantstopwontstop
– One time I swallowed gum… seven years? Bring it on.
– I go out on cold days with my hair wet.
– I cross the street when the little walky man isn’t showing.
– I tore a tag off of a mattress once. Come at me, feds.
– I read books in dim light.
– I eat more than the suggested serving size on a bag of chips.
– I use my blow dryer in close proximity to my sink.
– When I stay at hotels, I don’t return my room keys.
– I bite down on suckers instead of sucking on them.
– When event invitations say “bring a friend,” I don’t bring a friend.
– When I swim and get out of the water, I don’t reapply sunscreen.
– When I start an exercise program, I don’t consult my physician first.
– I dance freeform during the Cupid Shuffle.
– Sometimes on Facebook, I click “like” when I don’t actually like something.
– I message people “lol” when I’m not laughing out loud.
– I’ve used wifi from a hotel I’m not staying at.
In what ways do you “break the rules?”